Category Archives: Style

Getting Real about bay area style

In this month’s issue, GQ has named San Francisco the 20th Worst Dressed City in America. Quite frankly I’m surprised we didn’t crack the top 10. You know why we get this ranking? No it’s not the hipsters running around the mission wearing holey tights or mom jeans (I blame American Apparel for this).
It’s the people who dress in “gear” instead of clothes. You aren’t thinking about style — whether an outfit matches, or is flattering, but your pants have more pockets than any human could possibly need during the work day. Oh and your t-shirt has special wicking properties that keep you dry and odor free.
What lies at the heart of this performance driven “style”? Cargo pants. I’ve hated cargo pants since middle school when I would see boys stuff them full with pencils, papers, calculators, you name it. I thought it looked ridiculous. And since the universe has a sense of humor I ended up working at a startup in the Bay where about 70% of the guys wear cargo pants on a daily basis. A few months ago I came across a blog devoted to cargo pants. This blog had a post about cargo pants with pockets designed to house iPads. Are.you.kidding.me? The best part was, several pants were tested and rated and the overall conclusion was

“Bottom line? You should keep your iPad in a case and use tactical pants for iPad 2 storage in emergency situations only”


Emergency situations?!? Why would there be any situation where you need to store an iPad in your pocket? The reviews are talking about how well the iPad fits, whether it might fall out or potentially get scratched and no one is mentioning how absolutely absurd it looks. How about situations where you don’t want to look like a total geek? Orrr situations where you want to be able to say…walk comfortably, which I think would be hard to do with that thing shoved in your pocket?
Last fall I went to Madrid with a fashionista friend from Oakland who had never been to Europe. She said to me, I just can’t believe how people dress here, it’s like what you see in fashion magazines. In the bay people don’t dress like that. Yes the aesthetic here is more Patagonia catalogue, less Vogue.
And I get it, these clothes are very useful and serve a purpose in the outdoors. But we are in the city people. This is the urban jungle. Trade in those Merrells for some heels, or a pair of ballet flats. Don’t worry you will not be kidnapped, helicoptered and dropped in the middle of the wilderness unexpectedly. Stop thinking about high performance and start thinking about aesthetics. Guys, I know you think those zip off pants are practical, but you practically have zero chance of picking up a girl if you wear those to the bar. Something to think about.

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Filed under Fashion, Flora, Style

Getting Real about Mariah Carey’s only good song AKA all we want for Christmas

 

In honor of Black Friday, the girls of GRR got together to create our “bitch, please no coal in the stocking” wish list for the 2010 holiday season. We’ve been reallllly good this year (kind of).

Flora’s picks:

Le Creuset pan (in Orange)

It came as no surprise to us that our resident gypsy chose this cookware, describing it as “magical”. May the new year bring numerous helpings of “magical” risotto to our plates.


Christian Louboutin Declic black pumps

“So high. So sexy. I could never wear these in San Francisco, but I’ve always wanted one pair of ridiculously expensive, impractical shoes.”

Ramya’s picks

Personalized stationery from Minted

“I have an obsession with stationery, especially fun, girly prints. Who says snail mail is a thing of the past? I adore getting mail that isn’t bills or catalogs.”

And yes, this Hindu-turned-agnostic still loves Christmas trees, wearing a Santa hat 24/7 and receiving presents in December.

Sony Bravia with Google TV

“Right now, our TV setup involves a receiver from Craigslist hooked up to a 26-inch computer monitor. It feels so 2003. A shiny flat-screen with seamless integration with the web is sorely needed.”

Ramya may be drinking a bit too much Goog-juice but the TV is really slim and pretty – the way we like our men.

Marisha’s picks

Michael Kors Wedges

In the immortal words of Carrie Bradshaw, “Hello lovers! These will.be.mine.”

Vespa scooter

“If I was really, really good this year, I would ask Santa for this. But I wasn’t so I’ll shoot for it next year. Maybe even add a sidecar for my future yellow lab, Gus,” – Marisha

Marisha suitors of the internet, take heed — what she really wants is a yellow lab puppy in a basket with a bow on its head. You can also throw in a Bernese puppy for Katie.

 

Katie’s picks:
“OMFG is it going to be a sweet xmas if Santa brings me all or any of the items on my list.”

Hunter Wellies
“I have finally found my perfect rain boot, and obvi, they hail from my Royal ancestors in the United Kingdom.  If there’s one thing England has a good grasp on, besides a pint and shepherds pie, it is rain gear.  I am partial to the Original Tall Metallic in Midnight Blue.”

 

4th AMENDMENT UNDERWEAR
“Can’t wait to walk through a body scanner wearing these… “

 

What’s on your holiday wish list? Leave your picks in the comments.

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Filed under Fashion, Flora, Katie, Marisha, Ramya, Style, Tech

Getting Real about saying goodbye

RIP, Old Friend

I loved him.  I really did.  Sure, I haven’t heard from him in over ten years.  And, sure, we may have had our differences:  He was having trouble adjusting to the changing of the times and was set in his ways.  But, I loved him.  I loved the soft humming of his motorized heart.  I loved the way he used to mimic Alvin and the Chipmunks.  I loved it all.

I can’t believe he’s gone.  And they way he had to go… it makes me shudder.  Sure, he may have felt neglected and marginalized, but it didn’t mean I didn’t have a place for him in my heart.  Even though I would probably never hear from him again.  And even when I did hear from him, it would be muted and garbled.  Regardless, he was a part of my childhood and made me feel so much cooler than anyone else.

On October 25, 2010, Walkman was murdered by his father, Sony.  He was 31 years old, was survived by his equally obsolete brother, Discman, and no one could give two shits.

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Filed under ghostwriter, internets, Music, R.I.P., Style, Tech

Getting Real about slap bracelets (that tell time)

Once upon a time, I had a slap bracelet. A beautiful neon pink slap bracelet with unicorns on it. And then, it was taken from me by my shrew of a second grade teacher. Apparently, slap bracelets were dangerous. And then they weren’t – only the metal kind were. The plastic kind that I had rightfully won at Sport Time U.S.A with 1000 tickets in skee-ball winnings was just fine. My bracelet was returned, as was my popularity.

I don’t know what happened to that slap bracelet. Here’s what I do know: Henri Bendel is now selling slap bracelets for $50. I guess there’s also a watch attached.

This is obviously a cheap ploy to get 20-something hipsters to buy watches…cheap ploy or not, it had this 20-something at hello. And who wants to bet Serena is rocking one of these bad boys in the next episode of Gossip Girl? I’m willing to wager, oh, $50.

What’s that? Your elevator doesn’t open into your Upper East Side penthouse apartment and you don’t have $50 to spare for a “slap watch” (yea, that’s what they’re called – real original)? Don’t despair. You can buy 50 slap bracelets for $19.99 at Oriental Trading Company in an assortment of colors and designs. One for you and every other person who came to your pottery-painting birthday party.

 

My 6 year old self is beside...myself

 

I like the cheetah one myself (MEEE-OW).

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