Category Archives: Fashion

Getting Real about bay area style

In this month’s issue, GQ has named San Francisco the 20th Worst Dressed City in America. Quite frankly I’m surprised we didn’t crack the top 10. You know why we get this ranking? No it’s not the hipsters running around the mission wearing holey tights or mom jeans (I blame American Apparel for this).
It’s the people who dress in “gear” instead of clothes. You aren’t thinking about style — whether an outfit matches, or is flattering, but your pants have more pockets than any human could possibly need during the work day. Oh and your t-shirt has special wicking properties that keep you dry and odor free.
What lies at the heart of this performance driven “style”? Cargo pants. I’ve hated cargo pants since middle school when I would see boys stuff them full with pencils, papers, calculators, you name it. I thought it looked ridiculous. And since the universe has a sense of humor I ended up working at a startup in the Bay where about 70% of the guys wear cargo pants on a daily basis. A few months ago I came across a blog devoted to cargo pants. This blog had a post about cargo pants with pockets designed to house iPads. Are.you.kidding.me? The best part was, several pants were tested and rated and the overall conclusion was

“Bottom line? You should keep your iPad in a case and use tactical pants for iPad 2 storage in emergency situations only”


Emergency situations?!? Why would there be any situation where you need to store an iPad in your pocket? The reviews are talking about how well the iPad fits, whether it might fall out or potentially get scratched and no one is mentioning how absolutely absurd it looks. How about situations where you don’t want to look like a total geek? Orrr situations where you want to be able to say…walk comfortably, which I think would be hard to do with that thing shoved in your pocket?
Last fall I went to Madrid with a fashionista friend from Oakland who had never been to Europe. She said to me, I just can’t believe how people dress here, it’s like what you see in fashion magazines. In the bay people don’t dress like that. Yes the aesthetic here is more Patagonia catalogue, less Vogue.
And I get it, these clothes are very useful and serve a purpose in the outdoors. But we are in the city people. This is the urban jungle. Trade in those Merrells for some heels, or a pair of ballet flats. Don’t worry you will not be kidnapped, helicoptered and dropped in the middle of the wilderness unexpectedly. Stop thinking about high performance and start thinking about aesthetics. Guys, I know you think those zip off pants are practical, but you practically have zero chance of picking up a girl if you wear those to the bar. Something to think about.

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Filed under Fashion, Flora, Style

Getting Real about Mariah Carey’s only good song AKA all we want for Christmas

 

In honor of Black Friday, the girls of GRR got together to create our “bitch, please no coal in the stocking” wish list for the 2010 holiday season. We’ve been reallllly good this year (kind of).

Flora’s picks:

Le Creuset pan (in Orange)

It came as no surprise to us that our resident gypsy chose this cookware, describing it as “magical”. May the new year bring numerous helpings of “magical” risotto to our plates.


Christian Louboutin Declic black pumps

“So high. So sexy. I could never wear these in San Francisco, but I’ve always wanted one pair of ridiculously expensive, impractical shoes.”

Ramya’s picks

Personalized stationery from Minted

“I have an obsession with stationery, especially fun, girly prints. Who says snail mail is a thing of the past? I adore getting mail that isn’t bills or catalogs.”

And yes, this Hindu-turned-agnostic still loves Christmas trees, wearing a Santa hat 24/7 and receiving presents in December.

Sony Bravia with Google TV

“Right now, our TV setup involves a receiver from Craigslist hooked up to a 26-inch computer monitor. It feels so 2003. A shiny flat-screen with seamless integration with the web is sorely needed.”

Ramya may be drinking a bit too much Goog-juice but the TV is really slim and pretty – the way we like our men.

Marisha’s picks

Michael Kors Wedges

In the immortal words of Carrie Bradshaw, “Hello lovers! These will.be.mine.”

Vespa scooter

“If I was really, really good this year, I would ask Santa for this. But I wasn’t so I’ll shoot for it next year. Maybe even add a sidecar for my future yellow lab, Gus,” – Marisha

Marisha suitors of the internet, take heed — what she really wants is a yellow lab puppy in a basket with a bow on its head. You can also throw in a Bernese puppy for Katie.

 

Katie’s picks:
“OMFG is it going to be a sweet xmas if Santa brings me all or any of the items on my list.”

Hunter Wellies
“I have finally found my perfect rain boot, and obvi, they hail from my Royal ancestors in the United Kingdom.  If there’s one thing England has a good grasp on, besides a pint and shepherds pie, it is rain gear.  I am partial to the Original Tall Metallic in Midnight Blue.”

 

4th AMENDMENT UNDERWEAR
“Can’t wait to walk through a body scanner wearing these… “

 

What’s on your holiday wish list? Leave your picks in the comments.

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Filed under Fashion, Flora, Katie, Marisha, Ramya, Style, Tech

Getting Real about your sexiest Halloween ever

“In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up in costumes and beg for candy. In Girl World, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.”  – Lindsay Lohan R.I.P. (she was dead to me after her 4th re-entry into rehab)

You really have to love this time of year.  There is a briskness in the air as you walk down the street wrapped up in your new J. Crew cashmere scarf.  Both your latte and your beer taste like pumpkin.  You contemplate buying another pair of boots just because.  And you should be receiving a package of Halloween candy from your Mother any day now, because she knows how upset you get about being too old to trick or treat.

With Halloween just 2 weeks away you are no doubt deciding on what your costume will be.  Who cares if you have no party to go to yet.  You get to wear a little more makeup and show a little (or a lot) more cleavage than is normally socially acceptable.  And if worse comes to worse you’ll go to the liquor store on Halloween all dressed up and purchase that solo bottle of wine.  But at least the check out guy saw your outfit and thought you looked hot.

You know you want to look good.  And by look good I mean show as much skin as possible.  But you have already played the sexy referee, done the slutty police officer and lost the keys to your handcuffs, you completely trashed your skanky Dorothy costume last year when someone tripped you in your ruby red stilettos and you landed face first into a tray of candy corn flavored jello shots.

This year you are ready to take on the challenge of slutting up the unexpected and unusual costumes you are pretty confident no one else would think of.

I just want to give you a few ideas to get you started…

Did you want whip cream on that grande latte sir?
That’s right this outfit comes with a gun

and a satchel which you could totes use for the office.

 

that's one dirrrty hostess cupcake

 

 

And just when you thought plumbers crack wasn't sexy

 

 

I'm a sexy Realtor obvi

 

 

Who doesn't like Mrs. Potato Head?

 

 

Look I'm a remote control - sooo many hott buttons to push

 

 

this outfit needs no caption

 

 

This chic looks nothing like Julia Roberts but really who cares?

 

 

freaky child dolls that kill you with an axe are totally sexy too

 

 

Anorexia = SEXY (definitely a conversation starter)

 

 

The last time I felt really sexy was when I ordered a huge bowl chow mein and fried rice. Wait! Is that a fortune cookie hat?!?!

 

 

Wear this if you want everyone to try to have sex with your tail

 

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Filed under Fashion, Katie

Getting Real about fall fashion trends

As New York fashion week comes to a close today, let’s examine some of the trends that we have seen (more specifically the trends that I’m personally excited about).

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1. Metalics — more specifically gold. aka bejeweled. if nothing else shiny and sparkly which makes my eyes so very happy.

2. Menswear for chics — the boyfriend sweater (everybody loves it), a tailored blazer (pulls together an outfit instantly)

3. Minimalism. Black is the new black, yes that’s right. Black will never go out of style. It’s simple, it’s elegant, it goes with every skin tone and hair color and it’s slimming. In addition to a little black dress, I’d highly recommend, a little black sweater, a little black jacket, a little black blouse, and a little black v-neck tee.

4. 50’s inspired clothing – long pencil skirts and hourglass silhouettes (yes, although you may not see it watching the models on the runway many women actually have curves…and boobs and enjoy clothing that is tailored to accommodate that). Thank you Christina Hendricks.

5. Purple make-up — yeah so anyone that knows me, knows that I often like to match my eye make up to my outfit and as it turns out I have a lot of purple shirts.

6. “I don’t care” hair
— I can’t tell you how long I’ve waited for this look to come into fashion, I knew if I waited long enough, people would see the charm in the look that says ‘my hair hasn’t seen a comb in days and maybe I slept on it and maybe it’s a bit frizzy and perhaps I just got caught in a windstorm’. Shiny and sleek has never been my thing. The funny thing is that I know now magazines will be writing articles about how to style your hair to look like you “don’t care”. Trust me, it’s easier to just not care, and the look will be achieved all on it’s own.

And of course there is the saying, “out with the old, and in with the new” so I will take a moment to mention trends I’m ready to NEVER SEE AGAIN.

1. Shirt dresses — over them, maybe because I can never ever find ones that fit me well.


2. Pantsuits and rompers — let’s just keep the pants and shirts separate people. If a piece of clothing makes going to the bathroom a hassle, I say no thank you.

3. Crocs — the bane of my existence. Can we please, please, PLEASE move on. They aren’t even that comfortable, and even if they were they are so hideous it’s actually offensive to my eyes. And the fact that they come in bright colors and you can add charms (or flair if you will) to them makes them even worse. Any shoe that you can just hose down does not belong on the streets, it belongs in your garden, where no one has to see it.

disturbing isn't it?

4. Leggings as pants — ok I adore leggings: they come in all different colors, some are dressy, some are casual, some have lace trim, some have buttons, some are short, some are long, and let’s face it, I will take any opportunity I can to wear soft pants in public. But leggings are made for tunics, and long shirts. No one wants to see the outline of your crotch. It’s a little intimate, I don’t care what American Apparel says.

too much crotch

5. Lesbians (or young boys for that matter) with Justin Beiber’s haircut. If you don’t believe that it’s a trend, please see the following:
http://lesbianswholooklikejustinbieber.tumblr.com/

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Filed under Fashion, Flora

Getting Real about my weekend in SF

So it is officially Wednesday which means I am locking down my plans for the weekend. Unfortunately, the boy from last week has not called/texted so I think it is fair to assume my new phone is not broken and I can proceed with my standard girls weekend. (Don’t worry, I am not too upset since I did get a super-swanky dinner at Spruce and unknowingly ordered a super-swanky, er expensive, glass of  sauvignon blanc. I am just pissed that had I known our romance was going to last all of two days I didn’t go balls to the wall and order the beignets with chocolate dipping sauce for dessert. UGH!)

Anyhow, even with a lack of male loving, this weekend is shaping up quite nicely. I got an email this morning that finally the House of Air Trampoline Park is opening on Chrissy field. Basically, for $14 an hour (and $10 for every hour after that you want to test your stomach) you can jump around on 42 conjoined trampolines and ricochet off padded walls. Even though the thought of this kinda makes me nauseous, I am eagerly excited to test it out.

Next up, I will be heading over to Japantown to experience J-POP (not to be confused with the Jersey Shore‘s J-Woww). J-POP is described as sensory overload of everything Japanese popular culture (anime, ridiculous outfits with bedazzled medical masks and pop music).  Katie has already promised to take in the sights with me and buy something inappropriately stereotypical (that’s why we became friends).

Finally, I will be heading over to Davies Symphony to watch my favorite comedian (don’t judge me) Kathy Griffin. Nothing makes me laugh out loud quite like her  ridiculous celebrity trashing and constant mocking of Oprah, Ryan Seacrest and Paris Hilton.

Hope your weekends are shaping up just as nicely 🙂

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Filed under Fashion, Marisha, Travel

Getting Real about Fashion Week

It’s fashion week in New York people but that doesn’t mean SF isn’t celebrating in our own special way…

"money can't buy you class"

I’m as giddy as a schoolgirl on my way now to Macy’s Union Square where the one and only Countess LuAnn de Lesseps from “The Real Housewives of New York” will be making a special guest appearance tonight!!!!

Who cares what she wears as long as she sings her instant classic “Money Can’t Buy You Class”

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Getting Real about Gwyneth Paltrow’s newsletter GOOP

As I’m sure many of you already know our dear friend Gwyneth Paltrow is not only a award winning actress, rock star mommy, and fashionista, she is also a prolific writer with her own blog, and by blog I actually mean newsletter, since Gwyneth is beyond blogging and a newsletter makes everything sound more official more newsworthy if you will. Which is why when you are rich you hire a New York design firm to build and run your weekly newsletter. And some admin assistant emails you the password so you can respond to comments in between yoga poses and cayenne pepper cleanses.

I was happy to open my inbox this morning to find GOOP’s latest newsletter. Oh “GOOP” is the genius name Gwyneth decided to name her heady organic newsletter. This week’s “It’s Goop” is titled “GET” referring to what you need this fall fashion season to update your wardrobe.

  1. Menswear – who doesn’t love a good tweed blazer
  2. Layers – obvi its fall – thanks Gwyneth
  3. Knits – GOOP recommends Stella McCartney for knitwear – but when a pullover costs me $1600 I think I’ll stick with the GAP
  4. Ladylike – Gwyneth references 50s fashion here – clearly she is totally jealous she didn’t get the part of Betty Draper on Mad Men
  5. Brocade = bored
  6. Shoes – “the best way to update a wardrobe is with a bag and a pair of shoes” – lace up boots for dropping Apple and Moses off at school
  7. Hats – think Don Draper drinking scotch
  8. Accessories – ribbons and heavy jewels are all the rage

how to wear a black skirt

I also really like when Gywneth models for us how to wear certain items of clothing.

Or how to look fabulous in your living room…

laughing at Apple smearing red lipstick on my cashmere pillows - my hair looks great

Possibly my the greatest GOOP newsletter of all time though dates back to the website’s early days.  Where Gwyneth speaks of a dear friend who did something so terrible that she could never could never find it in her heart to forgive her.  Obvi she is talking about former bestie Wionna Ryder here and Ryder’s little shoplifting incident caught on tape.  If there’s one thing Gwyneth doesn’t stand for it is trying to get away with ripping off her beloved SAKs.

FRENEMIES

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Filed under Fashion, internets, Katie

Getting Real about the BEST and WORST dressed at the Emmys

Who doesn’t love a good red carpet especially when I can drink wine, eat potato chips and laugh at Ryan Seacrest trying to impersonate a straight man.

Last night we saw some winners – so happy MODERN FAMILY brought home best comedy, definitely best comedic writing on TV right now, sorry Glee kids your heads are already too big, especially you Lea Michele who looks completely disproportionate after dropping 20 lbs.

And some losers – why did I have to listen to Jewel sing while the worst photo ever of Brittany Murphy flashed on the screen during the “in memoriam” segment. Apparently Taylor Swift was busy.

Getting down to it…

MY favorite dress of the night – KERI RUSSELL – perfect in pink vintage Scherrer

The WORST of the WORST – LAUREN GRAHAM – you own a mirror right – let’s start using it

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More sad faces for fan favorite TINA FEY – you know I love you but what would make you chose this dress, you would have been better off wearing the show choir costume from the opening number.

Yeah! South Side!

BEST acceptance speech – JANE LYNCH obvi – how could you not give her this award for her fabulous portrayal of Sue Sylvester on GLEE – she even gave a shout out to the south side of CHICAGO! “Yeah!  South Side!”She also thanked her beautiful wife (Lynch was married past summer in MA) and the rest of her young and talented Glee cast “When I’m not seething with jealousy I am actually really proud of you guys”.

Satin Suit by Tom Ford

Runner-Up – RYAN MURPHY – who won for BEST DIRECTING in a comedy series for GLEE – thanked Tom Ford for his suit.

Jimmy Fallon fit nicely as the host, giving us a more relaxed awards show than in the past.  Could have done without the twitter updates.

Opening number – Jimmy Fallon performs a show choir style version of Springsteen’s BORN TO RUN.  Loved it!  But who decided to let Randy Jackson on stage?

Of course you can’t do an awards show without George Clooney.  The Modern Family sketch starring George being written in as a fellow castmate was pure Emmy gold.  Did anyone else love Manny in a pimp suit as much as I did?

MAD MEN won for best drama – obvi – this show messes with my head every Sunday night, I love it – I hate it – I want to have sex with Don Draper – I want to slap Don Draper and mess around with Betty – I have weird dreams and always feel unrested Monday morning.  I would have been proud to see Roger Sterling pick up his award for best supporting actor but sadly that went to Aaron Paul for BREAKING BAD.

TOP CHEF won for best reality program – finally the Amazing Race doesn’t win it.  The magical elves were truly gitty about their statue and probably ate about it later.  Top Chef D.C. is the best season yet.

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Filed under Fashion, Hotness, Katie, TV

Getting Real about wearing pajama pants in public

Riding the bus daily, I come across some characters. But lately, there is one young man in particular that I’ve become fascinated with. At first glance he looks like just another dude riding the bus: crew cut, glasses, Northface jacket, backpack….and then I look down and what do I see? Pajama pants. I came to realize that each day he wears a different pair. Does he only take the bus when returning from slumber parties? Maybe if I looked in his backpack I wouldn’t find books and a laptop, I’d find a Ouija board and a bag of sour patch kids.

Do you really want to be taking fashion tips from MJ?

First of all, let me say I adore spending time in soft pants of all varieties. But pajama pants are absolutely unacceptable attire outside of the home. I mean if you are feeling lazy why not go for the old classic, sweatpants? Furthermore, why does a grown man own that many pairs of pajama pants? Why must they all be such bright colors and loud patterns? Why does he match them all with his shirts? Is he actually creating outfits centered around his pajama pants? Does he have a different pair for all occasions: hanging out pajamas, date night pajamas, sunday funday pajamas, night on the town pajamas? My mind is flooded with questions.

But more than anything I want to know what he wears to bed. I bet it’s nothing but a pajama top.

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Filed under Fashion, Flora

Getting Real about throwing the most epic hipster wedding ever

Weddings are all the rage right now. Katie posted about Chelsea’s star-studded nuptials this weekend. Marisha and I are headed to weddings next week. And it’s looking pretty good that gays in California will be headed down the aisle soon (insert glee here! no not that glee. this glee.).

But none of the weddings mentioned above have quite the hipster flair of the wedding depicted in this video. I’m talking ULTIMATE HIPSTER WEDDING. They even uploaded it to Vimeo – you don’t get more skinny jean than that.

Can you spot all of the hipster-y things in this video? Leave your “hipster hunt” finds in the comments. I’ll get the ball rolling:

  • Chuck T’s
  • Suspenders
  • Skinnier groom than bride

Your turn! Go!

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Filed under Fashion, Ramya, Weddings