The high five is a celebratory hand gesture that occurs when two people simultaneously raise one hand, about head high, and push, slide or slap the flat of their palm against the palm of their partner.
It has come to my attention, especially working in an office that is brimming with testosterone that high fives are used in an excessive and indiscriminate manner. Bad joke: high five. Well-timed “that’s what she said” : high five. Simply entering a room: high five. And I’m expected to participate in this and have to deal with a disapproving look when I refuse to high five over opening a can of soda successfully. For years I’ve been giving half-hearted high fives because I didn’t want to explain myself. But no more! Honestly people, have some standards for your high fives!
Maybe I’m being a little over the top but I think years of unsatisfying or downright unsuccessful high fiving has scarred me. Do you know how many times my older brother pulled the “too slow” move on me? Just witnessing an attempted high five that is left hanging makes me want to cringe let alone being involved in this sort of exchange. And then there are the unenthusiastic high fives where I feel like I’m slapping a dead fish. Why even bother?
This is why I’m sticking to my guns. If I’m greeting you, I’ll give you a smile, a nod, a wave. Maybe upgrade to a hug if I like you and you seem comfortable with it. If I want to acknowledge a good zing, I’ll shout out a “whaaaaaaaaaaa” or if I feel the need to make contact, a fist bump will do. But let it be known, it’s gonna take some work to get a high five out of this girl.